On The Fence About Having Another Kid?

Well Ladies, some good news happened to me when my sister-in-law got hitched about two weeks ago. The pressure from my in-laws to have another child was finally lifted off of my head, and so nicely placed upon my sis-in-law’s precious head.

People say, “Have another baby. Try for a GIRL. C’mom. You can do it. I heard there’s ways. You have sex before you ovulate. Missionary position. Oh ya, and don’t forget to douche.”

WTF! Douche? The only douche I’ve ever taken in my life is the “douche” I take every morning— “a shower” in French!

So, truth be told, (and my friends know this all too well), I would NEVER have a third child, unless I could produce a dancing pink ballerina. With pink Burberry dresses. And pig tails. Or braids. Did I mention pink? I would NEVER get pregnant to have a third boy. This would actually necessitate my husband putting me in a loony bin. “Honey, just don’t forget to pack my Ipod!”

On The Fence About Having Another Kid?

As it stands now, I am the family referee. It’s Thing 1 vs. Thing 2. It’s 6 year old vs. 2 year old, and let me tell you, my 2 year old can kick the sh&t out of any 6 year old! He’s fierce. He’s persistent… like me. And he’s a ball of energy… also like me.

But the truth is, all jokes aside, I’m in love with my family. I feel a tremendous sense of happiness and contentment with my two boys. I love it. It works. Two parents on the run grab two kids, and out the door you go in no time. I feel no desire whatsoever to put my head back in the toilet and puke for another nine months, and then be woken in the night to hear that piecing “Waaa, waaa, waaa.” I do however miss McDonald’s five days a week. That was HEAVEN ON EARTH! It went something like: eat a few bites of a quarter pounder, throw up, eat a few more bites, a couple of fries, a few sips of coke, throw up, and then finish the meal. I was a pro.

But, is it selfish that I’m just not on the fence about having another kid? I don’t think so. I grew up an only child, and the fact that I have two children is like having four for me. I grew up in a very quiet house. It was my just my mom and I. My dad was always traveling, and we did everything together. I was used to the quiet, and contrary to probably most women, I enjoy the quiet. I don’t enjoy chaos. I really don’t. That’s not to say I don’t love having people over or around. I do. I’m the biggest people-person you’ll ever meet and I love when my house is full of family and friends. I’m very sociable. It’s just that I also enjoy the quiet I grew up with. At the end of the day, I’m still an only-child loner.


So, until they come up with a 100% guaranteed potion to conceive a girl, I’m stickin’ with what I got. It works. I love it.

Please tell me, are you on the fence about having another child? Do you want to give one of your own away?


  1. I have boy and a girl both school age children, and I can very happily say no more kids for me!

    At one time I thought I wanted another baby, but I am at a point in my life that I am SO not interested in 3 am feedings, diaper changes and living with 4 hours sleep on a consistent basis. Plus the concept of having to work so hard to lose that pregannacy weight post partum, just is so far from what is on my mind…aside from the fact that I am over 40 and who knows even if I wanted another if it would happen at all.

  2. Hi Erica!

    I am definitely on the fence about having a third child. As you know, I am also an only child so having two is more than enough chaos for me. People also ask me “since you have two girls are you going to now try for a boy?” I always grew up thinking that three kids is a perfect number but I just don’t know in today’s world. Have to think about it and would wait a little longer anyway.

    Keep up the great blogging!!

  3. Hi Erica,
    I am in the same boat as you! 2 boys ages 5 and 3 and my full time job is “referee!!!! It’s insane in my house from 4-6pm everyday. I am in love with my kids but they drive me crazy too!!! My 3 year old is exactly like me, stubborn and doesn’t give in! He kicks the crap out of my 5 year old too! I am however very happy that I don’t have girls cuz when they get older boys are easier. All my friends with girls curse the world (lol). My whole life I’ve always wanted minimum 3 kids and now that I am in it I can’t even bare the thought. It’s so easy now, I grab one and my husband the other and we’re off. There are so many times that we are in situations were I think to myself “what would I do if there were a 3rd kids here?!?!?”.
    keep up the great blogging!

  4. I got a girl 4 yr 6mnts & boy will be 3 soon. They’re 20 months apart! I was adopted by my grandparents & grew up by myself.I never wanted ANY kids & it took me some time to warm to the idea of having a baby. I was 28 when she was born & 3 weeks before my 30 birthday,baby nr. 2! ABSULOTLEY NO MORE BABIES!!!!! She’s my little princess & love all girly things,fairies,dolls,dress up,PINK,dresses u name it. She’s also very clever & starting talking at 6 mnts. Well,I can’t say the same about my boy :o( I really didn’t want another baby,& the whole pregnancy I was very depressed,but kept it to myself. After he was born I felt like leaving him in the hospital & just GO!!! But of course that wasn’t an option! I struggled to breastfeed him & used a breastpump. Just didn’t like him sucking on me. I breastfed my girl for 14 mnts,but had to stop because I found out I was pregnant. I struggle EVERYDAY with my feelings towards him,I feel the tears coming on as I write this…I JUST DON’T LOVE HIM & it makes me soooo damn sad!!! How can I fix it??? I wish I could love him the same,what the hell’s wrong with me? I hate feeling like this day in & day out! For me 1 child has enough!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Weekly Tips for Empowered Living and Erica Diamond’s FREE Self-Care Resource Guide right to your inbox!