So, I’m sure by now you have all heard about the David Letterman 2 million dollar sex extortion plot to cover up sexual relations with female members of his staff… hmmm… this is sounding a little “Clinton-esque.” The story goes, a few weeks ago, Letterman found a package in the backseat of his car, left by someone claiming to have information on him engaging in sexcapades with numerous female employees.  Threatening to go public if the talk show host wouldn’t pay up the two mill, he was going to uncover the secret. Wow, Davey must have freaked!!

Letterman then participated with authorities in a sting operation, and eventually met with his alleged extortionist, and handed him a counterfeit two million dollar cheque. The guy was then busted. Yada yada…

So when I read the headlines today “Stars Stand By Letterman, ” I couldn’t help but chuckle. Chris Rock, Wendy Williams, they all feel he’s a great entertainer, and they wish him the best. Some went as far as to say they didn’t even see what was so wrong about carrying out an affair with one’s co-worker. I love this world! It cracks me up!

But, this all leads me back to secrets.  I hate secrets. I’ll never forget my first big secret. It was the first time I tried smoking. I was 9 YEARS OLD! Yes, 9! I know that’s crazy. I had a babysitter at the time, let’s call her “Joanne,” and she took me to the corner convenience store, and bought me a Mr. Freeze and her a pack of Craven As. I have no clue what the hell she was thinking, but she let me smoke with her. I may have even inhaled!

I didn’t tell my parents, but the guilt was eating me alive. Then, a few days had passed, it was the night of the 1984 Michael Jackson Victory Concert, and I was going with my dad! I LIVED FOR MICHAEL JACKSON growing up. Life size posters of MJ covered every square inch of my bedroom. Even today, his music is a constant in this house. Anyhow, back to the concert. I was going with my dad. I was psyched. But, instead of enjoying the concert, I kept having to leave to go to the bathroom (not to pee), because my nerves were completely frayed. I was feeling SO GUILTY about my smoking SECRET. Anyhow, I finally told me parents, and obviously, they gave the babysitter the boot. But finally, my secret was out. How unbelievably better I felt!

Now, this is a very elementary example, but I think it holds true for most things in life. My mom always had an expression, “The truth sets you free.” I believe this to be true. Now, I’m not saying Letterman had to come right out and announce his affairs with his co-workers. In fact, I don’t even think he was married at the time, so he probably felt he was doing nothing wrong other than playing around with some co-workers.

But secrets really eat away at you. Now I’m not talking about keeping your friends’ secrets. That you should always do. I mean living with your own. I mean if you are living a lie. If you are gay and stuck in the closet. If you are a drug addict and too ashamed to get help. If you are living above your means and broke. If you are hiding a secret.

I have met the most incredible and supportive people in my 34 years on this earth. People surprise you sometimes. I promise you, those secrets will poison you. So, find that person you think will be supportive. It may be a friend, a family member, or a therapist. But if there is one thing I hope you take away from this article, it is that holding secrets in ABOUT YOURSELF, is dying a slow death.

Have you been keeping a secret that you finally disclosed to someone? How did it feel to finally come clean? Share with our readers!

Also, as a follow up to yesterday’s breast cancer post, a loyal reader of ours and old friend who lost her mother 20 years ago to breast cancer asked me to post an upcoming event:

  • “Maxine Lazarus Hope & Cope Memorial Lecture.”
  • Monday, November 9th, 2009, 7:30PM, at the Jewish General Hospital, Montreal, Quebec.
  • Block B Amphitheater.
  • Speaker: Breast surgeon from Sloan Kettering, NYC,  expert in genetic breast cancer.

Until next time,