Let’s be honest: the phrase “prioritize self-care” gets tossed around so much these days, it’s basically become a catch-all for bubble baths, face masks, and wandering your living room with a crystal in one hand and kombucha in the other.
But let’s get real for a second.
Self-care is so much more than that. It’s not a luxury—it’s a life skill. One that can mean the difference between burnout and balance, between breakdown and breakthrough.
If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “I know I need to take better care of myself, BUT…” — keep reading.
Because the most common thing I hear is:
“I’m taking crappy care of myself right now. Where do I even begin?”
I’m so glad you asked.
Today, we strip it down. We go back to the basics.
This is your permission slip—and your practical guide—to start showing up for yourself in a whole new way.
Step 1: Know That You Deserve It
Let’s start with the elephant in the room: self-care is not selfish. It’s survival. It’s sanity. It’s sustainability.
According to a 2022 survey by the American Psychological Association, burnout is at an all-time high, especially among women juggling careers, caregiving, and the pressure to keep plants alive (we see you, dead fiddle leaf fig in the corner).
Here’s the mindset shift: When you care for yourself, you can care better for everyone and everything else. Repeat that until you believe it. Put it on a sticky note. Tattoo it on your forehead. (Okay, maybe not that last one.)
Step 2: Identify What Fuels You
Not all self-care is created equal. You need to figure out what actually fills YOUR cup—not your neighbor’s, not your best friend’s, and definitely not that wellness influencer with the perfect smoothie bowl.
Ask yourself:
“What activities, people, or habits make me feel energized, grounded, or at peace?”
Maybe it’s a quiet coffee before the world wakes up. Maybe it’s boxing. Maybe it’s blasting 90s R&B and dancing in your kitchen (my personal fave). Define your version of self-care, and own it. Unapologetically. I’m owning my Sheila E era.
Step 3: Do a Time Audit (Yes, Like a Grown-Up)
This step isn’t sexy, but it’s necessary.
Track your time for a few days. Look for patterns. Where is your time going? How much of it is being stolen by email rabbit holes, scrolling reels, or saying yes to things you don’t even want to do?
You don’t need more time. You need to be more intentional with the time you have.
Pro tip: If you spend 2 hours a night watching Netflix, no judgment—but maybe 15 minutes of that could go toward a self-care practice that actually recharges you.
Step 4: Schedule Self-Care Like a Doctor’s Appointment
You wouldn’t cancel on your dentist. So don’t cancel on yourself.
Put your self-care into your calendar like it’s a meeting with Beyoncé. Ten minutes of deep breathing. A 20-minute walk. A solo dance break. A therapy session. Whatever it is—schedule it, protect it, and treat it like the sacred thing it is.
Because what gets scheduled, gets done.
Step 5: Set Boundaries (Even When It’s Awkward)
Boundaries are your best friend. They’re the invisible fences that protect your energy, time, and peace.
That might mean saying no to that 6th Zoom meeting. Or letting someone else plan the class party. Or choosing sleep over doom-scrolling.
You don’t need to explain your boundaries to anyone. “No” is a full sentence. And if it’s hard for you, practice in the mirror: “Thanks for thinking of me, but I’ll have to pass.” Or as my friend says, “I appreciate the offer, but my plate is as full as I’d like it to be right now.” Bonus points if you do it with a smile.
Step 6: Start Small and Be Consistent
You don’t need a 3-hour morning routine, a yoga retreat in Costa Rica, or a personal chef. (Though if you have one, can I come over?)
Start with micro habits:
- A glass of water before coffee
- 3 deep breaths before answering a text
- A 10-minute screen-free walk
Small wins build trust with yourself. And consistency builds momentum.
Step 7: Check In Weekly
Once a week, ask yourself:
- How am I feeling?
- What’s working?
- What do I need more of? Less of?
Self-care is not set-it-and-forget-it. It evolves. You’re allowed to change it up depending on your season of life. Be gentle with yourself.
Step 8: Protect the Magic
Here’s the truth: self-care doesn’t happen by accident. It happens by intention.
You can absolutely create a life that feels good on the inside, not just one that looks good on Instagram. And it starts with choosing you—not once in a while, but regularly.
You don’t need to overhaul your life. You just need to commit to showing up for yourself, a little more each day.
So go ahead. Start today. Schedule that walk. Breathe. Say no. Say yes. And remember: you are worthy of your own time, energy, and care.
You’ve got this.
And if you need a reminder… consider this it. ?
If you are interested in prioritizing self-care, and finding more time in your days to balance your life better, I encourage you to check out two incredible free resources. My Self-Care Masterclass and CLOCKWISE: A Time Management and Productivity Workshop To Avoid Procrastination and Work Smarter, Not Harder.
And, if you’re curious how you’re doing when it comes to your self-care, I’ve got a quick self-care quiz which will let you know!
