I’m finally back home in Montreal after traveling a little too much lately- it feels great to be settled.
I am still jet lagged and pretty tired from my trip to LA. It was, to say the least… a whirlwind. Highly productive, fast, fun, and full of living outside my comfort zone. Just the way life should be if you ever hope to accomplish your dreams.
A few memories of the week…
While in LA, as I was walking into a meeting, I got a call from my husband that my son was vomiting. Murphy’s Law– of course he would get sick the minute I leave. Isn’t that the way life always works? Obviously I was devastated that I couldn’t be there for him. I felt like a terrible mother. Running through my head was, “Erica, you were just in New York last week at Blogher, now you’re away again. Where are your priorities?” I felt like I needed to be home.
But, there I was, walking into a meeting, so I tried to stay as emotionally present in my work as possible, and had a great meeting. But when I left, my heart went immediately to my son, and I called my mom and my husband to see what was going on at home. Later on that day, I was at my best friend’s house, and proceeded to tell her about my little guy at home, and the guilt I felt to be so far away with everyone else caring for him.
Her response, “Erica, you have amazing support at home- a mother, a mother-in-law, a husband. You’re here to work. And you know what? You are a wonderful role model to your boys. You have showed them the value of hard work, and chasing your dreams. You have showed them, that if they can dream it, they can do it. And that is a gift not everyone gives their children.”
And in that moment, I had an AHA moment. Because I had never thought of it that way. We working moms feel such guilt – guilt to leave work to be home for our child, guilt to leave our child at home to be at work. It’s the forever losing battle. But I never think of the impact that my work has on my kids– that they see a mommy who writes, and speaks, and tries to be of service to others around the world. I always feel the guilt – I never see the value in showing them that I am a person trying to make a difference, and so should they. I never realize that chasing my dreams is something that is a positive for them to see, rather than a negative.
So today, my blog is to teach you, what I learned myself. That you must follow you dreams. Because so many people never do.
While I was flying home, I looked out my window, and the sky looked so high, and boundless. I snapped a photo of the peaceful scene. It reminded me that the sky is my limit… and it should be YOURS too.
What do you think? Did what I say make sense to you? Do you ever suffer from working mom’s guilt? Are we women entitled to chase our dreams, or is it selfish to do so, and does it make us a bad mother? Where is the line between being a present mom, and not neglecting our own interests and passions? I’d really love opinion.
I will pop in next week. My kids are off until they return to school next Friday. They will be my priority next week. Happy weekend.
xoxEDxox
I’m studying for my broker’s license – and next year I have plans to register for University. I have a craving to learn and to seek out ways to advance my career. There are plenty of opportunities to feel guilty when I just can’t be supermom, but I’m learning to get over it. I’ve put in a lot of time being primarily “Mom” with my own dreams and aspirations sitting on the back burner. Now I finally feel like I will be a better Mom if I am nourishing my own soul and following my own dreams. Love your blog!
Tina, it’s never easy. Glad to see you’re following your dreams. Best of luck. Walk steady.
Great post. Let the sky be your limit. I love this.
Very inspiring post and true. I’m aiming high.
I too feel the guilt all too often. I had never thought of it that way so thank you. I hope you have a great week with your boys.
This is inspiring for all professional and family women. We would love to share this with other women in South Africa.
”What Would You Attempt if You Knew You Could Not Fail”, we feel this is a GREAT quote. We will be keeping it in mind going forward.
We will be checking this site for more Advise in future.
Erica, interestingly we share the same name and many of the same thoughts and experiences. I feel this way so often and I only have one child. I know he is so proud of me when I am “doing my thing” but the guilt of leaving or even what seems like abandonment at times does step in. It is a good reminder and thank you for this post today. I am writing you from all the way from the Caribbean and by the way, the book was excellent. Finished reading it last week. Keep up the good work….