Setting boundaries is self-care.
Oh yes it it.
A little psych 101: If you grew up in an abusive home, or neglected home, or with narcissistic parents, or where value was placed heavily on performance and external image- if you weren’t shown unconditional love and support or your feelings weren’t heard or validated, you might have grown up looking for validation anywhere and everywhere.
People who grow up in scenarios such as these, often struggle with maintaining clear boundaries in their lives and a lower sense of selfhood. I’ve seen it for YEARS in my coaching practice. We work hard on defining and setting boundaries together for well-being.
As you start to heal yourself, you might start to impose stricter boundary limits, which is such a beautiful act of self-love and self-care.
Why don’t we do this more often? Good question.
Our biggest fears about setting boundaries is that it could lead to:
someone we love leaving us
our boss firing us
our friends ditching us
not being liked.
And yes, it can happen.
Setting boundaries is scary work. It’s a tall order.
However, they can be created over time and with proper explanation/presentation to those that matter most to us.
If you’re tired of turning yourself into a human pretzel, boundary work might be something for you to look into this spring and summer.
I’m here to support you too.
I’d love to know, are you working on establishing boundaries with certain people in your life? Or maybe for yourself?