I’m a sap. I’m a sucker. I’m a hopeless romantic. Yup. I’m all those things when it comes to love and Valentine’s Day.  After almost TWENTY YEARS with my man, (wow I feel old), even on the days I contemplate murder, I can honestly say, we always make the time for passion in our marriage. But even couples in love need to change things up sometimes. Need a little spice. Need a little help to keep the plug sparked and charged.

Today, if you have been feeling distant from your partner, today I encourage you to reconnect. To let thoughts of anger, fall by the wayside. To forgive and come together. To decide that today, you will find passion. Today, you will BE passion. Playful and fun. If you are in a new relationship, this probably comes a lot easier to you than to us oldies who have been DOING the same person for many years, and may need to work a little harder. 😉 And finally, if you are alone today on Valentine’s Day, I encourage you to rediscover YOURSELF today, and be good to yourself. If not today, when?

Today is for love and lovers, and it never hurts to get in the spirit.

A few tips on how to keep the passion alive this Valentine’s day:

1. It’s all in the detail.

Today, make the time for your partner. Whether it’s preparing a seductive playlist for tonight, or getting the candles ready in your bedroom, or the perfect outfit he finds attractive. Yesterday, I bought beautiful lingerie, special for tonight. I can’t wait to sample it! Pay close attention to detail today. CREATE the atmosphere. It will make your partner feel special, and you in turn, will feel the love as well.

2. Say Yes.

For all the times you say no. No because you’re too tired. No because you’re overworked- in motherhood or life. No to something your partner likes. Today, say YES. Just try it. You have no idea where the YES may take you.

3. Passion Thankfully Isn’t Expensive

You don’t need an expensive meal or a dozen roses to find the passion in your relationship today. Just doing things differently– cooking a romantic dinner after the kids go to sleep, taking a hot bath together tonight, or sending your man X-rated photos of yourself throughout the day to get him in the mood, will do wonders! Today isn’t about spending money. It’s about appreciating each other. That don’t cost a thing.

4. Revisit what first brought you together

After years of wear and tear, kids, work, money stress, redundancy, couples can sometimes look at each other, and feel as if they are looking at a stranger. Often it takes a little gratitude, appreciation, and reminding yourself of what drew you together in the first place, to bring you back.

5. Commit to creativity

Decide right here and now, you’re doin‘ things differently today. There’ s no better way to get your partner excited than to tell them NOW, it’s ain’t gonna be the way it always is. Today, commit to trying new things. Remember, sexplorations are safe and fun between two loving and committed people. Think CREATIVELY. NO MISSIONARY POSITION TONIGHT! Need I say more?

6. Laugh and be playful

Our most romantic and passionate nights start off when we have laughed together. When we are enjoying each others’ company as two playful partners. Go see a ROM-COM (romantic comedy) tonight if you can find a babysitter. Your night doesn’t have to be this big, sexy, wild evening. Laughing with each other can be the biggest aphrodisiac.

Yes, that is us alright. 😉

7. Ask and you shall receive

Today is not the day to be inhibited. If you have wanted to slow dance to music in your bedroom, ASK. If you have wanted your husband to do something to you in the bedroom, well ASK! Ask and you shall receive. But, give a little too today. I came across a quote I thought was good for Valentine’s Day:

“Save some of your best self each day for your spouse. Do not give them the leftovers.”

Well said. Of course it goes both ways.

Wow, here we were, married only one year. How time has flown.

Obviously, relationships are complex. They time time, work, effort and mutual respect and appreciation. The above are not fixes for relationships who are in need of real marital help. Today was meant to inspire you on Valentine’s Day. I hope that if you’re able to reconnect for today, the effects will be long-lasting.

I’d love you to share, what are YOUR tips that have kept the passion alive in YOUR relationship. Also, what are your Valentine’s Day plans?