If you look at a person’s daily routines and actions, you’ll likely be able to tell a lot about their health, wealth, and happiness.
Habits are key to your successes and well-being and happiness in life.
I’ll say that again for the people in the back!
Your habits are key to your success and well-being and happiness in life.
Which means, everything I often speak about when it comes to changing your life and forming new habits (remember, 21 days days to form a new habit and 66 days for it to start to become more automatic), it all works, but only if you consistently stick with them.
In essence, our life is as good as our habits. The “little” things you do each day are the difference between producing positive results, no results, and even negative results. Habits dictate your well-being, your happiness, your emotions, your career, your finances — habits are everything.
The key to creating lasting change is repetition. It can’t be a one off that you do occasionally. Transformation is created when we are disciplined and couple that with the power of repetition. What you do sometimes won’t create lasting change. What you do most of the time will. Simply put, our habits become our lifestyle.
So, what are 5 habits that are actually draining your energy, and what can you do about it now?
1. Constantly Checking Email & Social Media
Americans check their phone on average once every 12 minutes – burying their heads in their phones 80 times a day, according to research.
See if you can create two-three “check in” email blocks – mid morning and late afternoon dedicating a set amount of time to read and respond. If someone has to wait a few hours for an email response, the world won’t stop turning, so BREATHE.
Same goes for social media. Create check in times, and SET A TIMER (20 minuets is fair) so you don’t get sucked into the SM vortex!
Did you know that the average person complains anywhere from 15 to 30 times in a single day?
I know, it’s COVID. It’s easy to complain.
Instead of complaining, try and focus your attention and energy on problem SOLVING, rather than problem creating. For example, instead of complaining how exhausted you are, try and get to bed earlier and learn how to start saying no (comes with learning about boundaries, and more on that below). Instead of telling people how overweight you feel, try and make the effort to start making some time for a movement regime.
Every time you’re about to speak and it feels likes a whine or complaint is about to come out, stop, and think again about what and how you could better say that thought. In fact, think: is there any point to saying that at all? I mean, is there really a point to complain about something you have zero control over, like the weather or the bad traffic? It’s futile when you think about it. We can’t complain about what we can’t control.
3. Taking Things Personally
This one is easier said than done, I hear you. But here’s the thing: taking things personally can be our biggest energy suck. It can literally change our entire mood by riding off of someone’s else’s vibe and then feeling like YOU’VE done something wrong. You then can start to feel resentful or like you’ve offended someone, when most of the time it wasn’t even about you at all.
IT’S COVID – the world is walking around more on edge, more pissed off these days. Chances are, their mood towards you HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
What you can do? Remember, it’s most like likely about them and not you. Stop taking things so personally. You do you, boo. Most people are dealing with their own shit right now, so please take people’s moods these days with a grain of salt.
4. Not Getting Enough Sleep
“All the kale in the world won’t help if you’re exhausted.”
Sleeping can be your number one productivity and energy booster. Getting enough shut-eye time is the foundation of a life of happiness and well-being.
During sleep, your brain repairs and you boost your immune system. We know the studies on lack of sleep: risk of high blood pressure, diabetes, obesity, stroke and depression.
What’s the optimal amount of sleep? In a sleep study done by The American Cancer society, the findings were those who live the longest sleep 7-8 hours per evening.
I have spoken about the 4 pillars of well-being: Diet, Exercise, Sleep and Stress Management. Nurturing all the other pillars will help with sleep, obviously. If you move your body and exercise, eat well, have a stress management toolbox, you will sleep better.
A FEW QUICK SLEEP HACKS:
*Having an evening ritual or routine helps: nighttime bath or lavender tea, watch or read, journal or listen to an inspiring podcast
*Unplugging at least 60 minutes before bed
*Charging phones out of the bedroom
* Worry List: place a pad and pen on your nightstand. If you wake up in the middle of the night and your mind is racing, get it out of your head and onto paper to deal with tomorrow.
5. Constantly Pleasing Others & Forgetting Yourself
Living your life according to other people’s standards is a sure recipe for UNhappiness.
Now stay with me here.
We’re going to have a little chit chat on self-esteem and boundaries as it pertains to pleasing others.
Good self-esteem makes it possible for you to impose clear boundaries– it lets you say no when you want to say no, and cures the disease to please others.
You with me on that?
When you have good self-esteem, you are usually good at preserving your boundaries (ex: you don’t answer you boss’s call at 9PM, you know you are worthy of rest). You let the lines between work and play become clear: you are able to separate the two and become more present in your life. Life becomes more balanced, and people stop stepping all over of you.
If you have low self-esteem, you’re usually not so good at creating and setting boundaries. If you have low self-esteem, you become the yes girl and the people-pleaser. You might notice an invasion of work into your personal life, you might be feeling burned out and like balance is impossible to achieve.
Only pleasing others and forgetting yourself is a true energy drain.
The answer? Building your self-esteem muscle, each day. When you feel good about yourself, you will start pleasing yourself. You will realize you are worth it. You will feel deserving of happiness. You will start to feel more energized as you start to care for yourself. Self-care is the answer to so much.
More on another day…