RELATIONSHIPS

I recently married my partner of nearly 20 years, both of us are now in our 50s. As a young girl growing up in India, I dreamed of one day marrying a man of my family’s choosing. But my Indian father and British mother had other ideas—they expected me to make my own way in life and to find my own husband, if that was what I wanted. If things did not work out, as my father would say, “Get a divorce!” While this was a unique perspective for any person in India at that time, he believed in that right, and did assist his own sister in getting one herself. He strongly believed—and instilled in me and my sister—what a man could do, so could a woman.

Off I was sent to America, to make a life of my own and to find a husband of my own, if that was in my destiny. It’s funny how we create pre-conceived notions at what age one can achieve certain milestones, like marriage. As a little girl, I thought marriage was out of the question after a certain age, as it would be unbecoming and disrespectful in the eyes of society. What a myth. As I grow older and wiser, I no longer hold on to my youthful notion of how life should be lived or experienced. It is all about enriching the soul. I know that now, in my 50s.